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Born Dirty To Last Forever
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Agnes was agitated. Which in turn made Mabel impatient.
Mabel skittishly guided her Nissan Micra into the heavy stream of High Street traffic. A small white van proceeded to cut her up. The young man on the passenger side of the van made a gesture intimating she was a dotty old lady. “What insolence!” Mabel was furious. “People have no manners now-a-days,” Agnes backed her up. The passenger man saw how angry the two old women became, so passenger made another gesture - the blow job sign. Heat of the moment humour. The van driver laughed. “Did you see that?” Mabel asked. Agnes had. Then the van vanished. That afternoon Agnes solved the Countdown Conundrum in less than 10 seconds but that second gesture sprung to mind again. She had no clue what it had it had meant. Pushing something into the mouth? It made no sense. It made Agnes feel even more vexed about the whole incident. Later that week, as she performed a certain gentle movement at her aerobics class for the over-sixties, the gesture sprang to mind once again. She thought to ask the instructor, a nice young lady with big bosoms. But by the end of the class it had slipped her mind. A week later, Agnes was with Mabel in the car again for their weekly pension run. Agnes tried to talk about what had taken place the week previous. She wanted to find out what the gesture meant. But back in the traffic Mabel was reluctant to talk about it. Mabel thought bad things were best forgotten. The unresolved puzzle of a gesture forced it's way into Agnes’ head on a regular basis for a number of months. Until one night she plucked up courage and enquired at a dinner party given by her clever, accountant son. All the other guests around the table smirked, controlling their laughter. “Oh mother. It's rather embarrassing. But I’m sure you’ll find it funny. It means, blow job.” But before Agnes had really thought about it, she asked, “What in heaven's name is blow job?” |
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